July 3, 2008
the moment my heart stop beating for a long time. i thought this is the end of everything.. i thought u gave up.. i wanted to hang up there and then.. i dont want to talk anymore. but i dont want to give u up.. i want to fight to keep u with me.. so i talk.. my brain has stopped thinking yet i still talk- random ramblings to keep the conversation flowing.. i thought, can i fulfil that fantasy of mine to replace the crack in your heart, to make u whole again? and now i know, no matter what, i can never mend the crack.. maybe i can make it less obvious, but the crack is always there, reminding you of the hurt, the pain, the love of the past, reminding me of how much u loved her, the many things u have done for her..
i am so happy to see u yesterday, to spend a quiet night with u, to see u after a week of not seeing you, to be able to talk to u after all the phone conversations. lean on me and i will be a pillar for u. suck all the happiness out of me if that makes u happier. take all my sadness away from me if it hurts to see me sad. i will be there for u whenever u need me, that is the only promise i can give u for now..
3:16 PM
